My precious BuBu

As I posted earlier, I will be updating my blog after weeks of delay during CHRISTMAS day!

Goosh..sounded soooooo lonely and pathetic.

Decided to tribute this post for my beloved BuBu as he chomps down the carrots from the highland.

After the chomping, I managed to get a snap of him laying off and enjoying a full tummy of fresh carrots.

Well, when it is time to bed for the human, we have to lock him up. But he was too smart for a bunny, we had to block his cage entrance with big object or else, he will be freely wandering the house.

Why I said so, please take a look at the following video. That explains it all.

Cameron Highland (2d1n trip..so tiring)

The originate of this trip was from AiLing's idea.
Was merely a normal msn chat that she mentioned to go on holiday with her family to Cameron in conjunction with the Haji public holidays.

I was thinking, why don't I bring my mommy for 2days 1night trip? She will be thrill!

After much hesitation by her and my boyfriend and hassle of finding the hotel stay there.

We finally get it through the plan.

AiLing's family was very early that they reach my place sharp at 6something in the morning.

Then we, brought them for the most famous Jln Ipoh dimsum.

Was in the wee hours in the morning, I hardly take any bites there.

My stomach still in sleeping mode.

After the breakfast..off we go!

My mom did a very good job of trying to avoid me for dozing off while driving.
She kept talking all the way from the dim sum place till we reached the resting area for toilet break till we reach Simpang Pulai until we reach Cameron Highland - highest peak - Brinchang.

The drive from Simpang Pulai to Cameron was ok. The roads were wider and I feel comfortable driving. So driving up is totally recommended using this new route - Simpang Pulai. But this route takes 30-45mins longer than the Tapah's one. But if you are a carefull and coward driver like me, I really recommended you using Simpang Pulai.

When we reached the peak, we were amazed by how cold the weather was and crowded the highland was. It seems the whole Ipoh and KL peeps were camping there.

Due to my researches about nice food in the highland and even driving to the wrong town, we managed to get a bite and refreshment from this cafe. It was recommended by all websites regarding the highland.

The name of the cafe: T Cafe. Situated just along Starbucks (the only Starbucks in town)

They serve the best scones. Sorry lar was too busy chomping down the scones. So I got the menu list instead. LOL

The chicken chop ordered by my BF. The souce is GOOD!

Tasteless onion soup. Not a good pick

Weirdest taste lagsana. Not my thing!

After fulfilling our stomach, and unable to check in to hotel, we decided to drive around the area and we make it to a moderate size cactus park. Here we cam whoring the beautiful flowers and scenes as much as we can. The following are some nice shots. With excellent lighting and posing. Fierce!

Rather 'new' colour for our Hibiscus

That's my mom. She aint looking at the camera!

Some flowers pictures snapping

Colourful CACTUS!

Ah...Lavender.....

Mickey Mouse Cactus +_+

Me and mommy

I think this is ODD.....=_=

The weather wasn't good for a walk during our visit, but that did not STOP us for doing the market shopping spree! When it was about time to check in, we rushed back to the hotel. We stayed in Century Pine Hotel and situated at Tanah Rata. Since I booked through an agent website rather than directly to the hotel management, I was not worried of getting no room as I had paid 10% deposit on my room rate. But surprisingly, the rooms that I booked were all full and there was NO room for me! With hesitation, the manager had to exchange a suite for my deluxe room. At peak season like this, the suit cost RM560 per night. But I was only charged RM200++ for my deluxe. Of course with the same rate of a deluxe room, my family is staying the suite instead! Wohohoho...Was darn excited getting into the room.

The living hall

A staircase in the room!

A door that separated the upper and lower floor

Staircase leading into the bedroom

Aww..the western european attic feel

A HUGE bed

After a nap, we went to the local night market for another round of shopping. The rain was soaking us and the cold wind almost kill us. Then, we headed to hunt our dinner. The restaurants were all crowded so we really did not know which to pick. So we end up trying the Cameron Highland Steamboat restaurant. The taste of the soup is good. But consider at average rating.

After the dinner only we realised there was a restaurant serving organic vegetables steamboat named: Blue Mountain. Should try this instead. Anyway, too late to say so.

We tried the 'yin yang' soup. Original and Tomyam. FYI, TomYam the best in such cold weather!

AiLing and BF busy steamboat-ing

Was a real tiring night for me, the driver, decision maker and banker. Before I called it a night, managed to snap the vege and fruits I bought from the market.

Those were for my BuBu

Huge radish! Only costs me RM2.50

Red ripe STRAWBERRIES

The next morning, we enjoyed our breakfast at hotel which served continental and local breakfast in buffet style. Erm, I am not fond over buffet, so just get my stomach fulled after scramble eggs, toast, corn flakes, fruits and orange juice. I am totally over the buffet. The food taste moderate too but the coffee sucks! As I am a caffeine addict, I am sure if I did not take the dose for the day, I will be at no fit position to drive (well, serious eh?) So, we walked to the Starbucks to get some there.

As we walked......

And as we walked....

And as we still walking...

Geez, we still need to checkout no matter how I love the cool wind and environment here. So, before leaving the hotel, we snapped more pics.

B-L-U-E Christmas Tree? I prefer the tradition one though.

Before, leaving the highland, we dropped by the WaterCress Valley. That's water cress. I prefer it in soup!

We used the same route back to Simpang Pulai. The road going down is KILLING Me! The gradiant is too steep for a nervous geek driver like me. So this make a BIG NO for me to drive down if I am given the second chance. I think I did hear the drivers at the back cursing me for being a snail. And I think I ruined my BF car too. The brake pedal must be finished!

As we touched the ground safe and sound, we decided to get some Ipoh famous Chicken Rice before ending our trip. Thanks to Agnes direction, we managed to get to this place. Crowded and the food I rated it above average. The umph given to the rice they serve. Fabulous. Lou Wong Tauge Ayam Restoran.

Nice tender chicken. Taste good.

How can we missed the bean sprouts!

I had two bowls of rice with that chicken and bean sprouts. Yummy! I was so worn out driving down from the highland and I need carbs and sugar to get my attention back on the track. (Lame excuses for a Pig)

Anyway, from there we really end our trip.

It was really tiring for me, and I think same goes to AiLing...

Just can't wait for the next trip.. :P

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Lyrics contribution from KP

We soooooooo into Christmas celebration...
Thanks to KP for her contribution on the second part of our song:

U better not shout,
U better not cry,
U better not scared,
I'm telling you why..
Boss is on his way back to town.....DAMN

He knows when u r chatting..
He knows when u r surfing...
He knows when u r 'snake-ing' time..
So work hard for BONUS sake..HEY!

How issit?
LOL

Christmas AHEAD!

Yes..being so near to my used to be GALA celebration which fill with food, gifts, champange, laughter and joy..this year is a total DOOM!

In order to make up to my losses I'm still getting use to, I had asked the whole TA (only MCAs to be exact) to my house for a small gathering. Since the Chinese 'pantang' disallowed me to visit other people home, I left with no choice to have mine at home. Though I really hesistated to do so. Come to think of getting the food done, tidying up the house and making sure my bubu not giving me any headache!

Geez...was kinda regret having that gathering at first. But we did have a good time and food was rated at average and worth the price.

Anyway, I will get the post done ASAP. And my Cameron Trip.
Geez..I promise..will get it done during my doom Christmas Holiday.

Aiyor..sounded so sad. I am suppose to celebrate my Christmas by blogging lonely at home..
Aih..I miss celebration and parties!!!

I am miserable.
I miss all the celebration and joy but I hate that at the same time.
Maybe is due to my loss.
I miss him being the driver and taking us for Christmas dinner.
I miss him when I am lost and seeking for a human map.
I miss his nagging over me for not cleaning up the house and keeping it tidy.
I still miss him.

Hmmmph...Maybe it's too hard.
Too hard to forget.
Will try my best to keep the memories alive yet stop mourning about my loss.

OK..Let's do something fun.
Was up to work this morning, and while I was driving.
This song popped up.
And I do think the lyrics are COOL.
My boss being away for almost 20days for his long year end vacation, will be back to Msia by today. Finger crossed he will suffers jet lag for being up on air for 20 + hours so that I will only be seeing him after Christmas holiday.
Dear Santa, that is my Christmas wish.

So a song specially for all TA members:

You better not shout,
You better not cry,
You better not scared,
I'm telling you why....
Boss is on his way back to town...DAMN!

Wuhahahahahah
Wuhahahahahah
Wuhahahahahah
WUhahahhahaha

Adjusting to new haircut

After much hesitation I been through...

I had made the decision to change my look once and for all..

Was little too drastic..

Some says FAT..VERY FAT

Some says CUTE..

What will you say to this:-

Another shot below:

The above was taken few days after the cut and styling done by professional stylist ler..

It was my mistake not to take a shot right after the visit to saloon.

Geez...I look frizzy in that eh?

I am so near to EXPLODE!

YES! I am soooo near to explode!
Chances will be given until Friday 9 o'clock in the morning.
Question here is, am I a good example to actually highlight the issue?
So far, I've been keeping up to the records and no silly mistakes was done.
Blogs are done at home and posted in the morning before work starts / after work / at home.
MSN..only when it is necessary.
So, am I fit enough to stand firm on the ground and warn them to put a stop of their obnoxious and irrespect behaviours?
Darn..how I wish I have an answer to that?
Why is so darn hard to stick by the rules?
Is this the new culture every youngsters are trying to develope and taken over the more discipline and multi tasking US?

Well, to tell you all straight, you people had ruined your performance!
Trying to impress me is the hardest thing to do on earth and messing with me is the last thing you wish you would have try to.
To regain your credibility, better kiss my feet!
Please, why can't you at least put an effort to try and impress the boss?
Why is it so hard to do so?
Just be honest and responsible and FOLLOW INSTRUCTIONS!
If you all from wealthy family and money is the last thing you care in you life?
You are so wrong honey!
I am from the same back ground and money is also the last thing on earth I would want to care.
Yet, I am working so hard to gain my reputation and credibility among the rest.
So please do think twice who is the boss here!

Grrr.....verbal warning will be the last option before I approaching the higher level to obtain a written warning...
Oooo..I just can't wait for that to happen.

Pray hard honey.
Pray hard.

we Missed the Yong Tau Foo!

Damn we missed it again!
The crowd was superficial!
The cars were all packed up along side of the road.
We end up having the same stall.
Urgh!!!
This eventually drives up the whole team motivation to give it another chance the next time we crave for Yong Tau Foo..
We MUST do it!!!
A BIG MUST!!

A brand NEW look

Was too caught up with my stress and disagreement with someone @ office today.
I think I am over exploited by my BOSS.
He had been stuffing work into my to-do list and I suppose to enjoy my ThanksGiving but was dedicated to work..Then I thought I can make it up for coming Christmas.
Hell NO!
Before he depart from the town, he still enjoying loading more burden onto my shoulder.
What the heck?
It is so unfair to me and my team!
Yet, I did not dare to open my mouth and say NO!
Wtf?
Damn...
So being no mood in my boring email replying and schedule planning work, I can't help but grunt inside my heart!
And this behaviour is absolutely bad for health.
I am suffering severe gastric and exhaustion.
Argh!
Then I think, what the heck?
I need to do something to stop my anger coming out of my mind!
So, was browsing through some information just now..But, I was reading some Bursa news instead! Man...I was suppose to ease my anger and cool down my tense! What am I doing reading some work related news!???
Who Cares I read and being over efficient about my work????
Idiotic!
Thus, I add another blog entry and change the look of my beloved BLOG!

ahhhhh...it did make me feel better!

A cheap dinner of four @ LiJin - Pavillion KL

Yes, another food feast trip with the girls yesterday night.
Girls night out dinner + bitching about other people's life.
This time, the location was LiJin - Pavillion KL.
A fine dining Chinese cuisine. Sound expensive.
But there was this Peking Duck promotion at RM28 for the WHOLE duck!
Which is cool for everyone of us!
We ordered the duck of course. Then the skin was wrap with some spring roll thing and we had the thigh for cold dish. The meat was fried with noodles.
Then we had the water spinach soup and toufu.

We means - Jane Yiling Chew and ME.....

What can I say about the food..? The taste just moderate. If is not because of the promotion, I will have to think twice fine dining in this restaurant. After all the food feast I got myself into, with newly bought insurances and renewal of car road tax and insurance..I almost need to declare bankcrupty for this month! Luckily I'm still Mommy girl....Mommy paying for the insurance....weeheee...No lar...company is paying for it...Just trying to give a wrong perception to you all!

But that night was great. Instead of bitching, we also had lots of women talk.
Yeah, we are women d..No longer girls jor..
That is like so SAD!
Anyway, I appreciate sharing my thoughts and feelings with my beloved friends.
I love them for who they are and I know they love me too!
I can't think I will able to find true friends like them anymore.
A memorable night. I think we can have it monthly. To catch up with each other life.

The bill for the night just about RM98.80. Nice numbers!
So we shared equally and only RM25 per pax. (we round in up ler..we are not that kiasu to count the cents too!)
Btw, want to specially dedicated the following to dear friends:

Life still have to go on no matter what and who is fucking around us..
I know is always easy to say than do..But, you still have to clench your teeth and hold your fist to get yourself out of that ass hole..LOL..so, just need to remember, you still have a bunch of friends that are willing to share your joy and tears!

Kamsiah ah peng yew!!!
Wo ai ni men!!!

Anyway, no pictures taken as I did not want to look like a idiot in a fine dining restaurant holding a camera and flashing the light around.
I'm Datin Ling not a papparazi!
And I don't need to whore around with my camera..
I have my own actual and sufficient supply to whore!

hmm...maybe is my preference. I prefer my blog filled with words.
Writing is always something I love to do for 'my-time'..

Hope my writing is improving after so many posts!
Btw, we are going to have a luncheon in the Yong Tau Foo stall AGAIN. But this is the other more famous one...Oooo can't wait...

Our first time Lunch outside MIHARJA!

Uploaded some pictures when we had our lunch in Jln Peel famous "Yong Tau Foo":-

Our Siew Sergeant - wiping her mouth after delicous meal

Sick Prince couldnt drink the cup directly - he has to do it by sucking the straw. Germs according to our servants. Sick Prince is like that, easily to fall sick!

Our Cold Princess sipping through her herbal tea while browsing her mobile

Can you guess how many pieces of Yong Tau Foo we ate? We had 4 pax that day. 27 pieces in total. Geng!

I did not take much pictures ler..were too busy with the food. Definitely is a YES for second and third and zillion times again!

We are looking forward for more luncheon opportunity which is OUTSIDE Miharja area. Can't wait for next Friday!!

Well, we can only have 'illegal' longer lunch period on Fridays, as bosses always not around in office on that specific day. But, guess while my boss away from town for > 3 weeks , we can do it EVERYDAY! WAHAHAHAHHHAHAHHAH

I am a NASTY manager!

Food Feast!

Phew...blog twice today!
Happy mar...
Just got my salary and I had reduced my debt.
ooo..before proceeding, I just bought another insurance..with a handsome agent. He is 30 years of age but looks way younger than me and he is driving a BMW!
Heck..what I am doing then? Adding more into his full pockets?
LOL...Sorry Jeff...
Btw, back to the happy moments...
I been planning to treat my sifu for quite some time..so I finally had the time to treat that old lady. We went for Kiku Zakura and LF is included in my treat-list.
Erm...were too busy with chomping down the food.. I did not take down any pictures.
But we ordered the following:

Appertizers: Edamame (RM12), Salmon Sashimi (RM48) Agedashi Tofu (RM12)
Main course wise, I ordered the Unagi Kabayaki (RM38).
LF went with Chicken Teriyaki and sifu went with some bento thing.
For me, I will not go for another round to Zakura.

First, is the portion they served. The edamame price at RM12 should serve a moderate portion as an appertizer. Instead, the portion equivalent to Sushi King which only price at RM4. Man, that is unreasonable!

Next, we still can taste the ice in the sashimi. Yes it is fresh but the salmon should be defrost before serving to the customers. But instead, they careless about this. This is a disappointment as I always confident on Zakura's quality.

The tofu is moderate lar. Nothing to complain about.

Then was my main course. The unagi served was only 2 thin slices and with chawanmushi that overly cooked with gingko. Surprising, I just smell the gingko but could not find one in it. The prawn in the chawanmushi was over cooked too. Second disappointment!

Overall, I rate it below average.
Nevertheless, the environment in Zakura is always the best. Maybe not much crowd that's why we have the whole restaurant for ourselves!

Of course the rating I gave is only applicable to the Avenue K branch. I remembered the one in BTS was really nice. And even at MV still remain the best.

But we still had a good night after all.

The next day, I am suppose to treat the kids for a dinner at Pavillion - Tony Roma's. My mom, aunty and uncle tagged along too!
We ordered quite a sumptous amount of appertizers as mom and auntie were too full for main course.
So I ordered: Onion roll full size for RM16.90, Tony's Platter for RM39.90 and Asian Grill Chicken Salad full size for RM19.90. As we had 7 of us in a table, the kids and me were quite hungry, we chomp down the appertizers in the speed of light. But to my disappointment, the platter comes with onion roll too. Sigh. Should order the fried mushroom instead.

For main course, I ordered the Buffalo's Sandwich at RM18.90. Well, its actually a burger. But I don't know why they call it sandwich. The filling is chicken and it taste almost the same as KFC Zinger burger. So, was quite disappointed on it.

The environment is just moderate to me as we were placed in the front porch of the restaurant instead of inside. So with the crowd, we hardly able to talk. Still the get together time with family members are the best. And again, I swipe the card.

Woop. two meals cost me to approx RM500.

Next will be trying Ninja Jones in North Point and bringing my mom, grandma and darling to DucKing in Jaya One this weekend.

Ninja Jones - for Chew belated birthday. As I am unable to celebrate with you, let me treat you for a good meal there. The reviews from the internet were good.

DucKing - as mommy wants to share the bill for the treat to the kids, I decided to bring her for duck cuisine. She loves duck. Besides, never treat grandma for anything so I feel guilty. Then, darling insisted me to treat him because of my promotion. So, how can I say NO?

Wahlao...with the above food feast that I get myself into..I will spend my salary just for that man! And I need shopping leh?

POk Kai lor.....

A stressful journey, and I am bound to walk every steps

From the beginning, I thought I will be celebrating this month.

The hatred I've been farming since the beginning of the year had finally come to an end.

Though the pressure has started to pilling up and my spine had been over stressed these days. I think I may not be able to handle more demands from my boss.

The days passed with tiredness and exhaustion.
I was late to work almost everyday. To be exact, since the day the hatred started. I promised myself to be a good example to my co-workers. But it was really a mess to wake up 1hour earlier to work.
Still I manage to make myself officially early to work...Well, punctual to work. Better than late right?

Then workload is getting more and more. As beside daily work like past, I am now responsible to review my co-workers' work. This almost KILL me. The reviewing of files are so dull and tiring. I can even see the figures flying all over the files. Darn! How I hate to review.

Next, planning. This sucks too! I am a control freak over my own schedule. My work always on time unless something comes up and mess up my schedule. But that is because the discipline that was thought by sifu and boss. But nowadays, the youngsters just has no discipline at all. We as senior has to remind them again and again for them to even get started! Not to mention finish! Darn!

Then, attending to boss higher demands. As my time almost used up by the above and yet I still need to attend his 24-7 high demand. We are like SWAT team. Ever ready for sudden appearance in a meeting which you don't even know whom u meeting with or what you will be discussion on. Yet, we have to pretend like Miss-Know-It-All so that we can call ourselves professional. Heck!

This is the most energy sucking and had been attacking my self esteem lately.
Due to the emergencies I had in previous years, I had been postponing my exams.
So whenever we are meeting with clients that are Professionals, they expect to talk to a professional. And I am not! Geez...How I hate those 'pigeon-eyes'!! I do not have enough time to do everything. Like reading the standards, newspapers, world economy related magazines, local and international market updates yet doing my daily work in one day in order to start a conversation with them. This is really tough. And it had been taking the toll out of my life!
Gosh....how I wish I not in such position...
Yeah I know, I sucks!
The pay and profile I soon to get is worth every second of hard work!

Of course pay can be higher >_<
But with my qualification and experience, I think I could not demand more at this moment.
So continue to strive for my professional exams.
Hopefully this time round, I am free from such emergencies I faced previous years. God, please have faith in me!

Luckily my working days only on weekday.
So, I still have weekend to retrieve the sleepless nights and exhaustion!
Basically the following illustrate how my working day start:

1. Wake up
2. Free the monster from his cage so that he could run like a mad cow around the house
3. Brush teeth + wash face
4. Drink water + refill water in tumbler
5. Bath and 'business'
6. Dress up + blow hair + make up
7. Drive to office
8. Breakfast @ office
9. On my laptop
10. Check email
11. Write down to do list for the day
12. Call client
13. Reply email
14. Review file
15. Lunch
16. Attend to boss demand
17. Lecturing staff
18. Preparing proposals and review files
19. Off work
20. Do my own files

So Sifu, really wor...
I can only do my own files after working hours.
Urgh....
Anyway, I try to squeeze everything in 8 working hours so that I can reach home early everyday. But that is impossible unless I postpone my work. Well, previously before promoted, I also try to work not later than working hours. And my excuse is I do not have office keys. So I need to pack and leave with the majority.
Out of the blue, I asked for office key from Mrs Boss that day. As I need to work quite late, and trying to repay my late to work for the past months. And without hesitation, she pass me the key. But before I say the key will be return the following day, she ask me to sign on to the log book. This proofs that the key is officially mine during my service period in this firm.
Well, nothing to be glad on. Cause you are expecting to open the door if no one is around in the morning. Which means, have to early to work rather than my usual practise = PUNCTUAL

Sigh.

Trying my best to get use to such life from now onwards.
But I just could not stop complaining..
I'm a woman..and woman complains!

P/S: Sigh. No longer address myself as girl ..Don't know why I feel old if use that word. I am really old. WOMAN!

Moving into New Work Station!!!

Wahkow! My new workstation. I was so excited about the shifting since I've got the news of being promoted to Ass. Manyzer. Not because of the position and salary (well, 60% lar...) the most excited part was there will be possibility for me to shift to a place equipped with air-conditioner blowing cool air right to me and a nice carpeted floor without any loopholes!

Yeap, that's right! My previous work station was HOT.
I was surrounded with 3 air-conditioner but none blow the air towards me.
And the stupid hole on the floor always give me the implication that because of my weight the hole is getting bigger and bigger. Mind you, the hole was there before I even shifted to that place!

I've been facing difficulties on whether to shift or not to shift.
There are some complications in the whole process and I would not like to go detail about it in here.
So, after rounds of considerations and discussions, finally I've made my mind to SHIFT.

Ta - da...
Just can't wait to get some nice classy office supplies to fill the new space!

Wah hoooooo....

How come life is so FRAGILE?

As I'm still trying hard to live my life without my father,
another bad luck struck our family.
My cousin bro - Bryan was diagnosed with brain tumour.
He is only 14, for God's sake!
Why it have to be us?
And there is no early sympthom that tells you have a tumour in your brain!
He was having double visions the last one week, so the parents decided to bring him to the doctor. But when the doctor advised to go for MRI - specifically for scanning any damaging cells (CANCER) in your body. The parents got panic and inform everyone of us on the bad news.

Later that day, doctor confirmed the boy has a tumour blocking the brain's fluid (there is medic term, but too long to remember). Whether the tumour is cancerous can only be confirm after a biopsy. But the tumuor is dangerous to the brain as it had block the fluid to drain and replenish it self. Therefore, an operation is needed ASAP to have a bypass passage so that the brain will not overflow with the fluids. But that is a dangerous op for any human being.

So sad to hear that. How a 14 year old boy tahan all that kind of pain.
It's unbelievable.

Cancer killed my father.
I am praying so hard that it will not happen to anyone else in the family.
Yet, the bad luck struck twice!
Damn it!!!

How can YOU be so cruel!

But the op went well and as per doc's experience the tumour may not be cancerous.
Well, we were glad but still have to refer to the biopsy report before over happy about that.
As we try to get as more info as possible from the doc on how suddenly a brain will has a tumour in it, cos the kid is sound and healthy since baby. The doctor said the boy was carrying the tumour since he is a baby. Every tumour grows as you age. And brain tumour gives no early sympthom. When the sympthom starts to unleash, it usually at the most critical situation.

Bryan, everything is taken care of.
Please be strong.
But as he is just too young to know this, we never disclose the news to him.
He thought something wrong with his eye therefore need to go for an op.
God, please give the family more strength to pull it through.

November jor lor...

Position officially changed from 1st November!
Waited anxiously for this day to come, though I am very sure the stress and pressure will be doubled in future.
But what the heck, I've signed and checked myself into that position.
Blessed me please.......
I am busying myself at the planning stage for the coming November and December schedule.
Nothing seems to have a clear picture.
So scared....

Argh!!!!

Damn Damn Damn

Living the 9th day without him

Oct 19th 2008, definitely gonna be the worst day of my entire life.
He decided to cut off all his sufferings and decided to join with God in the other world.
Daddy finally departed us on 8am that morning.

It was a total heart break for mommy and me and even my boyfriend.
Even though we spent the last few days accompanied him at his bedside in hospital, we did not seems to have enough time for him.
As his breath starting to slow down, which almost take 3-4 seconds for another breathing, my tears strolling down my cheeks uncontrollably.
My voice inside my heart telling me that I'll be losing my daddy soon.
I had never ever imagined myself living my life without him.

My parents shared the majority parts of my life, and never ever this cross my mind that either one leaving me this soon.

I cried while biting my fingers as I did not want him to hear my cries.

Aunty Lisa instructed me to stop crying as my dad is not letting go if I'm still crying.
So with all the power I had, I stopped crying.

1..2..3.. he finally stopped breathing.

That was the most painful scene I've ever see.
Though it was not the first time I saw a human being breathing his last breath, but that is my daddy.
My man of my life.
We shared joys and cries.
And now I had to say goodbye and he could not even listen.

I'm trying to recollect the pieces from the moment doctor told us that my dad will not hold longer than 3 days. That was on 17th October.
I remember taking an emergency leave off from work and rushing all the way to the hospital.
Daddy was already connected to the respirator as he had difficulties in breathing.
He was surprised to see me with my working attire.

"Why are you here?"

Did not know how to react, I lied. "I am on my way to client office and decided to drop by"

And he continue to sleep.

Mommy, Auntie Lisa and me decided to lie to him as we did not have the courage to tell him what doctor had said.

Then, my uncles and aunties were starting to visit him as we thought maybe the last respects to him.

We decided to celebrate his birthday which is suppose to be on the 18th.
But we are afraid that time will not let us do so, thus decided to make an early celebration.
We bought a cake and KFC that can accommodate to 10persons.
All nurses and family members gathered in his room and we sang a birthday song to him.

This brought back the memories on the 16th whereby he still able to sing out loud of a birthday song to mommy. My mommy's birthday on the 16th. He was happy and sound at that time.

Sighed. How horrible the cancer cells can make some one turn into such a bad situation within < 24hours.

So back to the 17th October, as my Uncle Kayu came to visit him, he told him this: "Don't you worry about anything, I will take care of my sister in law - your wife and my niece - your daughter"

Daddy just nodded. Then he speaks " You all think I will not pull it through tonight?"

Mommy said " No, we are just telling you not to worry about us. Just put yourself at the most comfortable state."

Daddy nodded and closed his eyes to sleep.

Everyone went back home.

As on the 18th, Daddy still at a very weak condition but able to speak.

But as nurses clean him, with his weak and shaky voice, he can still yell at it hurts.
Can you imagine how painful for him physically and how hurtful for us emotionally?
At that point, we really hope that his journey ended there as we could not bear to listen and see him in such pain anymore.

As time closing in, slowly the heartache came back, and I wish he still with me.

On the night of 18th, we thought his condition is Ok and mommy told us to go back home to get some sleeps as four of us had been camping at daddy's ward the past 2 days.
So we went back home and being unable to sleeps, I still manage to catch up with some drama series. Finally slept at 2am.

Ring Ring Ring.

My cell rang at 4am. I jumped out from bed and heard mommy voice over the phone.
"Leng, come over now, daddy is not doing good."

I woke him up, get dressed and rushed to hospital.

Daddy breathing is slower and weaker now compare to the moment I left.
No tears at that point as I was still trying to get some sleep.
But as about 6am, we woke daddy up and try to talk to him.
He barely open his eyes but still can give us some reaction.
We shook the concern away as we still think he is still hanging on to it.
Then we asked whether he wants some milk.
He nodded.
He could not go on after two tea spoons.
At that moment we cried.
We are losing him soon.
We called and shooke him.

"Ba..can you hear me?"

No response.

"Wai..can you hear me?"

No response.

But he still breathing.

We know, as Chinese saying, his souls had left us.
But the body still here.

We requested nurses to give him a last shower as we wanted him to be clean and fresh before departing this world.
The nurses came and washed him.
Even at his painful areas, he showed no response.

I hugged my mommy as we cries.

Slowly, daddy left us.

He had freed himself from the pain he endure since the last 3 years.

He left us with great memories, sad and happy moments.

He left mommy with his hard earned cold cash and properties to lead her remaining life. He left her with 30years and more of loving memories.

He left me with 25 years of care and love from father to daughter. He left me the responsibility to take care of his beloved wife. He left me with emptiness on my graduation of my professional papers, emptiness on my wedding and emptiness on my children.

He left him with the responsibility to care for his daughter.

Everything happened so fast and hard to recall from that moment on.

I remembered uncles and aunties rushing to hospital and crying as they lost their brother.

Then doctor came in to certified his time of death.

As we had prepared his funeral previously, everything was taken good care by the under taker.

Then I remembered as nurses came in to dress him into his own clothing, tied and wrapped him up with some blue clothing before sending him up the under taker's carrier.

We rushed home and packed his belongings, had a hot bathe and grab a bite before moving to the funeral centre.

Everything happened in a blink of eye and as I am blogging now from my work station, I am already living my life without daddy for the 9th day.

I think some part of me would want to keep the counting continues as this is the best I could do for him.

Mommy is busying herself with her work and trying her best not to slow down at any moment. She is having a hard time to let go of everything that is related to daddy.
Though his departure will ease her burden, but there do times where she hope that she is still worrying about his condition rather than the last goodbye.

Family support is great. I really appreciate my family members.
They are kind and loving towards my family.
Though there is one still I wish to stab her eyes with joss sticks!LOL..Daddy would not want me to do so.

So after today, I'll be living my life without him for the 10th day.

The counting continues till I dunno when.

My first Moet Chandon on a romantic (but K.O surprise) party!

I’ve been searching high and low for a suitable birthday present for him.
I went to do some window shopping and market research last weekend.
Man...I never notice how hard it is for me to look for a present especially for him until last week.
After preparing the detail list of items that can qualify as his present, brain storming for few more days and finally I had shortlisted 5 items that can consider as a good buy for him with valid reasons:
1. Document Bag – his one had torn long time ago
2. Cuffing – he owns only 2 pairs
3. Smart phone case – his new smart phone do not come with a chic casing
4. Neck tie – he does not own a quality neck tie
5. Pen – a professional signature comes from a quality and presentable pen

I’ve been walking almost every day last two weeks to search any of the above items. But the annoying part is my instinct keep on saying to think twice before swiping my card again. Not that I am gam siap lar, just that my ‘he’ does not simply buy stuff for unnecessary reason. He only spends on necessities. So then, I shortlist the above list again with reasons of deleting the other items:

Winner – Document Bag – I think he really needs one
Cuffing – nothing caught my eye
Smart phone case – the hardest thing to look for
Neck tie – he don’t even wear it for work
Pen – the one caught my eye was from Mont Blanc. Retail at RM1360, fountain pen. Crazy meh? Pen only wor..

And again I start searching for the document bag since that is the only item left for me to buy.
The one really caught my eye was Bally signature bag. Retail at RM1400++ Syiok! However, I was in dilemma between buying this one for him or another bag for myself. The design is exactly what I am looking for and retail at only RM5600++. Way cheaper than LV. I almost wanted to buy both that night and luckily ji mui Chewy was beside and keep on reminding me the purpose of the shopping, which is to look for his present and not mine. So, I walked out telling the sales rep I need time to think about it.

In the end, I did not get the bag as I think the bag was too big for him.

So being kia su again, I confronted him. Telling him the bag I suppose to get him. He rolled his eyes as if in shock that I will spend that much money for just a bag. I felt bad. He spent his fortune for me and I actually confronted him before making decision to spend on him..feel so bad!

Okay..call me gam siap.

He insisted I should spend on food for him. I decided to bring him to Lemon Tree @ Shangri La for a sumptuous buffet dinner. I’ve been there previously and the food taste is not bad, worth the money but the main reason I choose this restaurant because its buffet consists mostly meat which will be the best choice for him.

So on Saturday night, we went out for dinner and turn out that he was not too fond over the food. Gosh..sad for me..again, I paid almost RM300 for a dinner which he didn’t enjoy much.
Therefore, I have to make it work the next round.

His birthday falls on Thursday and on the eve; he was having dinner with friends and colleagues. Thus, my surprise plan starts after his dinner and my work.

As we share the same house, the stuffs for that surprise bash cannot be pre prepared as he will know of course! So I left with no choice but to get ready everything on that night of his eve. I am only available after 8pm that night, and he will be back by 10pm. So I had only 2 hours left for everything to work.

Grabbed my car keys and strolling all the way to Plaza Damas. Get into a wine shop and search for some red wine at first. But at a glance, my eye caught the Moet. Mmmmm...Retail at RM350. Gulp! That’s pricey. But it’s Moet! My mouth starts watering thinking about the taste. So without hesitation, I get our first Moet. Rush up another level to get a birthday cake. The name of the cake is Opera, and its choc and mocha flavour.

~~~ my Moet & Chandon~~~

Then rush back to mamak stall to get the ice for chilling my Moet.

Get everything prepared on the table. Change my clothing to a more appropriate one. Off the lights. Get the jazz music started and wait.

And Bubu also waited anxiously at the door. (he just freaked out why lights are off, actually! LOL)

Once doors opened..

Ta-da...

Happy birthday to you...........

Before I can finish the last line, he snapped in and said he knew I am preparing a surprise party just that he couldn’t think of what I will be doing. Damn...my nervous crack previously spoiled the whole thing. He said I called too many times confirming when he is coming back home.

Well, I am just worried that I do not have enough ice to chill my Moet as the ice I bought was melting and clock is ticking.

Though, he seems very happy about the whole thing. The old saying: thoughts that count!!
So we had almost half bottle of Moet. Wasted, just too tired for rushing here and there, and was sipping Moet with empty stomach. The alcohol just shoots up the brain and does its thing!

Still have half a bottle left in fridge but the taste gone.

Should have drink all before collapsing!

Wasted.

Well, it is still a romantic night to remember.

I’m wondering what my next surprise for him. Must be well planned and a real surprise for him!